They say your social life begins when you have a car...

Hah~ I still find myself lifeless. Aimless. Hypocritical. Two-faced. One even wanders why am I still doing these things, choir, 6 who died, etc. I guess it became a habit. Something that is deep in me, part of me, intertwined with the very core of my humanity.

Or... maybe, just maybe... I never really left. Or rather, I did but somehow unexpectantly and subconciously I start pushing myself back. Or maybe it is the other way around; someone pulling me back.

Who am I? Why am I here? Where am I going?

The questions, the messages, the songs...

Or maybe I'm speculating too much. Maybe I'm still trying to put myself at the center of the universe.







But I still hold on to that faint speck of hope; that He still cares for me.

I get it now, Life is short yet not so short...

We fall, we cry, we bleed, we get up and for what? To go through the same process all over again.

Time flies and.... there is only 8+ days left.... Scary. Haha. There I said it. The eccentric blockhead I am is actually scared. Hmmm... Maybe I'm getting a bit too engrossed in my character, but it's not enough.

Wish me luck! (funny, I started believing in luck all over again)

Tired, Sleepy, Exhausted, Drained and the list goes on....

The ironic thing is I seem to be more tired after my slumber than before sleep.

Rush-A-thon was a good waste of time and money, but let by gones be by gones. Studying seems rather appealing to me now, like as if I actually want to study. Soon, very soon.

Disjointed thoughts torments my waking hours.

Tata

When life gives you lemons, you suck on it and endure the sourness of life...

There is always a thin line between optimistism and ignorance.

Finals are just next week. It seems time flies when it's nearing the end. So much to do and so little time. Preparation & rehearsal for 15 August, would be choir practices, assignments, presentations, last minute cramming. Maybe this is what I was waiting for. As the saying goes, "My time to shine."

Or I could just roll over and indulge in worries and anxieties and at the end of it all, nothing gets done.

Why am I babbling all these things now? Heh! Must be the impending nervousness for my lack of preparation for oral presentation.

Anyway, as the title goes, I chose not to be too optimistic to the point of ignorance and rather face the problems, hectic-ness and deadlines head on with a smile on my face and survive through them. Yes, these things I faced now will be considered childish and immature but I'm sure they will mature me and make me stronger to take on more difficult trials in the future.

Toodles and may you all suck on your lemons with that in mind.

A true story.. well... not exactly

CAST: Lyon, Eng Hoe, Jon
DIRECTOR: Jon
CAMERA MAN: Kimberly

Part 1

There was once a gangster called L,

who goes around beating up people.

While he was about to victimized his 2152463421231th victim called E, J step in.


Just in time, J managed to stopped L from hurting E. E was shocked!

J then confronts L! L was shocked.

And J use the shockness to his advantage and evangelize to both of them.

E & L then kiss and make up.

J says his goodbye and went off to find more good deeds to do.

L then turns back to E and starts to whack him.

E was confused and hurt.

End of Part 1.

Moral of the story: Inward transformation is hard to come by.

Intermission:

Cast takes a break....

while director gets inspiration...

Part 2:

After the encounter with L from part 1, E was hurt. And there he was shuffling along the side walk, caressing his hurt arm.

J spotted E and wonders what had happen.

After hearing his account, J place his hands over E and pray.

E was healed! And they rejoice!

However, shortly after that, E spotted L in the distance.

E tried to attack L but J was there to intervene!

Unfortunately E seemed possessed by anger and tried to takes his revenge. But miraclously, J was able to grab E's arm just in time.

J calms E down and explained what will happen when he takes his revenge on L.

E forgives L.

End of Part 2.

Moral of the story: Forgiveness may not be fair but it sure can end the never ending cycle of revenge .

Blast from the past.

It's been 4 weeks now...

I've received my RBS letter from myself after 3 months. Still remained unopen. I guess I'm just too ashamed to faced myself.

It's been awhile...

Hello World!

Long time no blog. Guess I did not have the mood to blog. But it's funny why I am blogging now, since I have an assignment and presentation due tomorrow, my mid-term exams are next week, I need to memorize my script by this Sunday and it's been 2 weeks since that day.

College has been hard on me and honestly speaking, eventhough I am constantly surrounded by a bunch of new friends, I still feel alone. It's OK, I'm getting numb to it. 

At least last Sat I had a lovely break from reality. :D Canticle Singers were AWESOME. I'm so gonna get a pony tail! And I really sound weird on digital form, or maybe my brain just project my voice differently. Really, I sound like an Ah Beng. T___T  I need a new voice box... wonder if I can get it from the Body Shop. HAHA lame joke really.

In the mean time, have a limited edition picture of moi

Ok, that's all for now.

Have a nice day.

The Proton Wira was finally a Wira for 4 seconds...

O HAPPY DAY!!!!

Remember indeed...

A smile in the midst of the storm

Personality / Temperament for Jon Wee

Test taken on April 9th 2009

Personality: Melancholy Sanguine

Melancholy Strength:6 Weakness:8
35%
Read more about Melancholy Strengths
Read more about Melancholy Weaknesses

Phlegmatic Strength:2 Weakness:5
18%
Read more about Phlegmatic Strengths
Read more about Phlegmatic Weaknesses

Sanguine Strength:7 Weakness:4
28%
Read more about Sanguine Strengths
Read more about Sanguine Weaknesses

Choleric Strength:5 Weakness:3
20%
Read more about Choleric Strengths
Read more about Choleric Weaknesses

Interested in finding out what your personality is? Take the Test!


So ouch! I am a serious emo person deep deep down. So many negatives for Melancholic...
Kinda makes me wonder....

HAPPY MOURNING...

It is Good Friday after all.

The Love of God

Could we with ink the ocean fill,
And were the skies of parchment made,
Were every stalk on earth a quill,
And every man a scribe by trade;

To write the love of God above
Would drain the ocean dry;
Nor could the scroll contain the whole,
Though stretched from sky to sky

This stanza that we sang so often was originally found scribbled on the wall of a patients room in a mental asylum. Frederick M. Lehman then added the first 2 stanzas to make the song whole. The love of God holds no boundary to anyone. This child of God who scribbled this verse has understood perfectly how uncomprehensively vast the love of God is.

So how bout you? It is Passion Week. Thought about God's love lately?

If haven't, better start now then. =)

God Bless!

Barfday? Burpday? Blupday? Birthday?

This is a delayed birthday post to me. I originally was to lazy to post it, but a certain turtle or penyu won't let me off easy. Hmm... where should I start? Err... better start from the start of the eve of my birthday.

20th March

Guess I didn't expected much on that day except the RBS reunion because Li Ann was in town. Kinda fun spending the whole day in KLCC with a bunch of equally crazy youth to do just wander around and talk about anything under the sun. Literally just wander around and just talk. Hahaha! Shopping~~ XP But seriously it was fun to be reunited once again just after 4 days since the RBS reunion in Sunway Red Box. XP

Have a laugh, have a pic:

Camwhoring. Kim's speciality.

Emo-ing

Just wandering around... again.

Bring out the Bollywood-ness in me.


Bring out the model in me.

Bring out the kid in me.

Also bringing out the kid in me.

Again, the model in me. (I think I look better without Eng Hoe XP jkjk)

Teaching people how to skip like me. I need new recruits...

Us with all the happy smily faces.

Us again.

Ah... blissful time spending it with you guys. :)

Well, it didn't end there. About 4 o' clock I think, Keen King called me while I still was in KLCC to go out. So I was like okay. But the funny thing is they ask me to go and meet up at 6 30 pm. So I continue my lepaking with my RBS mates untill 6.00 pm.

I reached the Bangsar LRT station at 6. 30pm on the dot. I'm always early for some reason... even for the KLCC trip. And well... we only met up at 8 30 pm. I guess I learn the value of patience well. Enjoying the breeze of the evening air. Watching the sun decends slowly into the horizon among the polluted gasses.

I'll just fast forward now to fish & co since 2 hours of waiting is not so interesting.

Met up with Boon Yang, Wen Jun and Keen King and waited for Jun Yu and his girlfriend to come. Turns out the girlfriend was a childhood friend of mine. Interesting. But I didn't bother to tell her who I was. Too lazy I guess. HAHAHA! Well, at least they found out yesterday.

Interestingly I wasn't into fish that day, so I ordered sword-fish. XP Lame right? I know! haha down to 10 bucks in my wallet.

Note: If you think you are holy, then please stop reading from this point on... Thank you =)

Then we went to D'haven to celebrate my birthday. Hehe.... No shisha for me though. I still hold fast to my principles.

Long Island was nice. I prefer Blue Lagoon though. *hint *hint.

Here's some more pictures.

Keen King trying to be a pro shisha-er

Failed...

After about one hour (and after numerous times of "secretly" discussing about what to get for me), Keen King and Jun Yu went out to get my gift. Haha. Thanks for all your effort! And thanks for belanja-ing me AK-47 and the Long Islands and also the clown. The clown was pretty cute. =D Love it! AK-47 was fun to drink. I still love cherries. ^^

Me with me birthday gift.

Me savouring my birthday gift.

There was a video of me downing down my AK-47. Go to PenYU's blog to see. If you want to see that is.

Well, after the excitement and receiving numerous sms' wishing me Happy Birthday, we went back and crashed at Jun Yu's place.

Then went home the next day for my YF. And then went out to celebrate my birthday with GodMa. Dinner was not bad. Then next day, went for steamboat. My mom's friend belanja'd me again. Awesome steamboat at puchong, man!! STEAM AH!!!

Well, that's how I spent my pre, during, and post birthday days.

THANK YOU ALL!

GOD BLESS!!!

The REAL two weeks after RBS...

It's utterly shameful to admit how far I can fall just after 2 weeks of RBS, and even without the start of college yet. How I seem to find it harder to pray continuosly throughout the day, how I missed out my devotion for 2 days in a row, how I totally left God out of my mind during my birthday celebration yesterday, how I just fail and fail and yet still fail to put my priorities in order and how the fire of passion for God seemed to extinguished so quickly.

And definitely, how I slowly conformed back to the life of hypocricy...

I feel dry and dead. I'm just so so weak and fragile. My will is so shallow. I am truly pathetic.

I have hit rock bottom.

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But I guess when all the water in the well has been used up, the only choice I'm left is this:

Dig deeper.

It's truly amazing. How the Holy Spirit makes me realize these things. How the God of "irony" uses the brokenness in me to draw me closer to Him. From the fall, there'll be the rise. From sin, there'll be redemption. From the sick, there'll be healing. From death, there'll be life. From the feeling of loneliness, there'll be the inclination to be with people more. From natural disaster, there'll be unity among the people to help the victims. From the depression and feelings of unworthiness, there'll be a strong urge to lean on the power of grace and to seek God.

In the end, it's not love for God nor even the want to love God that's important or real to me now. I don't feel that at all.

It's the want of wanting to love God that counts.

And how?

by digging deeper...

"My grace is sufficient for you, and my
power is made perfect in weakness.."

Thank you God, for making me reflect on my life once again. And I doubt it'll be the last. I do still have a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong way to go.

GOD Bless!

The Perfect Results

God has answered my prayers! Praise God! I believe He had given me the perfect results to satisfy my soul.

I got 8 A's for SPM.

It's not straight so lest I can boast about myself and still not so low that I can be ashamed of.

Some of you might find me retarded but I don't care. God gave me this gift to prove that he cares for my needs. Not my wants but my needs.

God bless!

Back from outer space? More like inner space.

So much lessons learn, friendship made, laughs shared, tears shed, thoughts expressed... and all for what?
Life, of course!

RBS was an AWESOME experience. It's time now to live out the experience.

I am not holier now, I am more sinful than ever.

[edited]

I realised that the above was not really a fitful description of RBS.
So after reviewing some of my friends' blogs I was peer pressured into this:

What RBS meant to me:

Or what I learn:

Notes: This is not all there is to RBS, these are just some. There are just too much...

I learnt what it takes to be a real man, a leader.... with emotions/compassion.

I learnt to speak no evil, smell no evil, see no evil, hear no evil and think no evil. Or at least try to do them.

I learnt that everyone is just ordinary untill we get to know them.

I learnt to be serious at times... I'm serious...

I learnt that I should put more trust in the circle of close friends I have.

I learnt that God is closer than I thought, all I had to do is lift a finger.

I learnt that every moment is a gift from God. It is His present for us.

I learnt that I can accomplish anything through Christ who gives me strength.
(Yes the flag is fake but it still carries its meaning)

I learnt that I have a great mission team called Glasgow!



Thank You RBS, for giving me the opportunity to learn...

PS: noticed there are less girls in the photos eventhough the girls outnumbered the boys? That proves it, guys are just better posers than girls. Just kidding!

GOD Bless!

I am not rotting!!! I am just degenerating slowly...

Weeeeeeee It's the 3rd week of school reopen... Wait.... why do I care? HAHAHA no school!


Hehe... some of you might be wondering what I'm doing nowadays so that I won't go insane from boredom, so here's the list:

• Driving lessons (kinda fun but I really wish the instructor would stop leaving me all alone to drive around while he go yam cha)
• Gai Gai (basically just lepaking around with other free people, the Loos included)
• Reading (self-explanatory)
• Occasional gai gai by myself
• Helping around in the house.
• Internet

Yeah, maybe its not so much of a impressive list but it still achieved its purpose.

Residential Bible School is just next week! I'm really excited, yet still feel homesickness already. Amazing huh? Contradicting emotions usually happens consequently.

And I decided to stay back in PJ whereas my parents go to Kuala Terengganu on the the 23rd. I will catch them later on the 26th. Guess the reason for me wanting to stay back is... no idea? HAHAHA Maybe its because that weekend is the last weekend the Loos are here? Or maybe Zoe and Marie's farewell is this coming Saturday? Or maybe I want to spend as much time with the friends around me as much as possible before going to RBS? Or maybe there's not much relatives back in KT. After all, all my grandparents are gone.

So yeah, that means I'll be home alone for 3 days before CNY. Anybody wants to adopt me?

PS: I appreciate the advice from Ben Phua, "Go hunting in RBS, but please don't hunt preys you can't kill."

A new year, a new start

Yes, I know it is weird and late for a new year post, but heck I'm writing anyway eventhough it will be a short one.

It really is weird. To not buy text books for school. To not wake up early for school. To not be dressing up for school. To not do any homework for school.

But enough on that, I shall not dwell on the past if not I'll never move forward. Someone once wrote that, " To start a new life, you have to die to the old." I couldn't agree more.

So for now, I just have to be a ronin and bear with it for awhile.

Any wishes for this year? I wish I would be a more people person.

Enjoy the year ahead!